He
who attempts to act and do things for others or for the world without
deepening his own self-understanding, freedom, integrity and capacity
to love, will not have anything to give others. He will communicate
to them nothing but the contagion of his own obsessions, his
aggressiveness, his ego-centered ambitions, his delusions about ends
and means, his doctrinaire prejudices and ideas.
– Thomas
Merton
And
withal they learn to be idle, wandering about from house to house;
and not only idle, but tattlers also and busybodies, speaking things
which they ought not.
1
Timothy 5:13
But
let none of you suffer as a murderer, or as a thief, or as an
evildoer, or as a busybody in other men's matters.
1
Peter 4:15
It
is an honour for a man to cease from strife: but every fool will be
meddling.
Proverbs
20:3
Thou
shalt not go up and down as a talebearer among thy people: neither
shalt thou stand against the blood of thy neighbour: I am the LORD.
Leviticus
19:16
Among
the range of issues covered in my reports there is one in particular
which stands out, and which, from my observations and experience,
both personal and professional, has always generated the most
controversy: The importance of respecting the privacy and personal
boundaries of others.
Defining
one's personal boundaries is the sovereign right of each Individual,
not to be usurped by the government, nor by one's family, friends,
associates, colleagues, or by total strangers.
Without
establishing and defending personal boundaries, the Individual is
left open and vulnerable to invasion, intrusion, and ultimately,
attack, by the aggression of those whose purpose, make no mistake, is
to manipulate, to exert influence, to gain control. That is called
tyranny, whether it be the petty tyranny of the busybody, or the
monstrous tyranny of the despot.
Without
privacy and personal boundaries, there can be no true Liberty, nor
the rigorous execution of other God-given rights. The first right
must be the right to be free from any form of aggression. The right
to be let alone!
I
have found that the controversy always begins when one person draws a
line in the sand, and clearly states to another: Don't cross it.
The
aggressor then, failing to respect the clearly delineated boundaries
of that person, will usually attempt to justify his/her intrusion,
with such excuses as, I was only trying to help, or, I only did what I
thought best for all concerned.
These
intrusions manifest in any number of ways.
Appointing
themselves as unwanted intermediaries, as meddlers in the business of
others.
Presuming
to speak for others, without their knowledge or permission.
Discussing
with others that which was told to them in a private conversation,
which was meant to be confidential.
Making
private issues public, for a personal or political agenda.
Appointing
themselves as “peacemakers”, placing themselves in the middle of
the disputes of others, or attempting to draw totally disparate
individuals who have no connection whatsoever, into an unwanted
association. This is meddling, and makes “peace” for no one.
Attempting
to negotiate the nonnegotiable, justify the unjustifiable, excuse the
inexcusable, for a personal or political agenda.
And
the list could go on...and does, in the report given below.
Most
important, under universal moral absolutes, it is the defender of
privacy, of personal boundaries, who always holds the moral high
ground, for a very simple reason: An aggressor of any kind is always
a wrongdoer.
Barbara
Hartwell
August
13, 2021
DO
NOT EVER...A Common Sense Code of Honor
http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2012/01/do-not-evera-common-sense-code-of-honor.html
Persons
of good moral character, of honor and integrity, did not just "get
that way" by accident. No, there are no accidents in God's
Universe. The truth is, God gave each and every one of us what I
consider the greatest gift imaginable, aside from Life itself: Free
Will.
Will
you use that Free Will to respect and honor God, and His creation, by
making every attempt in your actions, and in your interactions with
others, to obey God's Laws and reflect His Glory? Or will you slap
God in the face by becoming an aggressor against others, by trampling
the God-given, Unalienable Rights and Liberties of the Individual?
Make
no mistake: God-given Rights are bestowed upon each INDIVIDUAL and
anyone who violates those rights will be held accountable; even if
justice is not done in this earthly life, there is no escape from
God's Justice.
Don't
"believe" in God? That doesn't change the reality of God's
existence, as you will certainly learn – one way or another, sooner
or later.
Among
those who don't acknowledge the existence of the Creator, the One
Almighty God, but rather believe that there are many "gods",
or even that they are gods unto themselves, are those who will tell
you that there is no "evil" and no "good", no
right or wrong, but only the "balance" of Light and
Darkness (good and evil) in the universe. Some are so arrogant as to
claim that they are "walking the line" in some grey area
between the Light and Darkness, to preserve this "balance".
According to their strong delusion, in their futile attempts to
usurp the very power of God, they have appointed themselves as a sort
of Cosmic Police Force to maintain "order" in the universe.
These are the persons who believe that the "ends justify the
means", and whose aggression knows no bounds. Avoid them like
the plague.
It
is my belief that aggression is the root of all evil. But before
going into detail about some of the acts that comprise aggression, it
is necessary to define the nature of aggression. Aggression can be
understood, first and foremost, as a LACK OF RESPECT for the privacy,
personal boundaries and the Inviolability of Personhood.
I
do not approach this subject from a "legal" perspective,
nor even from a "religious" angle but rather from a general
spiritual/moral/ethical perspective. For my purposes here, I will
define a "Person" as any individual human being or other
sentient creature. And I do believe that yes, God sees "every
sparrow that falls". God sees every act of kindness, compassion
and mercy, every act of selfless service to others in accordance with
God's Laws, and every act of cruelty, aggression and injustice.
But
this report is not about sparrows, it is primarily about the way
Persons of the human variety treat one another, and about a Code of
Honor, which if scrupulously followed, removes aggression from the
equation.
Before
you can RESPECT the rights, the liberties, the privacy, the personal
boundaries of others, of the INDIVIDUAL, that is, you must first
fully ACKNOWLEDGE them.
Communists,
socialists, leftists – collectivists of any stripe-- by
definition cannot respect the personal boundaries of others, simply
because they refuse to even acknowledge them. The so-called "common
good" is their hue and cry, and in their false belief that the
collective trumps the individual, they don't give a damn about
trampling individual rights. But in truth there can be no "common
good" as long as the rights of even one individual are being
violated. This totalitarian ideology, or tyranny, in any form, is
rooted in aggression against the rights and liberties, the privacy
and personal boundaries of the Individual Person.
Then,
there are the garden variety busybodies, whose aggression may be less
extreme and more mundane, but it is aggression all the same.
Aggression is a slippery slope, and those who set foot on that path
will eventually reach the bottom – at least, without a revelation
of truth and a conscious effort to remedy their attitudes and
actions, before it is too late.
But
it doesn't take an ivory-tower philosopher or religious scholar to
see the truth. Anyone with the common sense God gave them may know
the difference between right and wrong, between good and evil,
between respect for an individual's rights and personal boundaries,
and the aggression that violates them.
All
that being said, here's a Common Sense Code of Honor, very simple and
easy to understand. It is not all encompassing, not by a long shot.
Mostly, it is just based on MINDING YOUR OWN BUSINESS and leaving
others in peace to tend to theirs. Not overstepping your bounds. Not
interfering, not meddling, not engaging in acts of aggression, in any
form.
DO
NOT EVER...
Invade
the privacy of another Person.
The
Right to Privacy is an integral part of Individual Liberty.
DO
NOT EVER: Snoop into the private affairs of others. A Person has the
right to keep secrets, if he so chooses. He has the right to the
quiet enjoyment of his home, his property, his personal/family
relationships, without outside interference.
A
Person has the right to keep the physical address of his home, his
telephone number, his e-mail address PRIVATE, to protect himself from
prying eyes, unwanted public scrutiny and threats to his security and
safety.
A
Person has the right to privacy in his personal papers and effects.
This includes his private journals, emails, audiotapes, videotapes,
etc. Anyone who steals these private effects, and/or who willfully
invades the privacy of another, by publishing such personal
materials, is not only a busybody, but a malicious wrongdoer.
DO
NOT EVER: Violate the confidence of a Person who has shared ANY sort
of private/sensitive information, by divulging those confidences to
others. If someone has trusted you with private information about his
life, respect that confidence and keep the information to yourself.
Do not be a tale-bearer; do not be a gossip. Loose lips sink ships.
They also destroy friendships. Do not become a Town Crier for the
private business of others. It's not your place, not your story to
tell.
DO
NOT EVER: Show up unannounced and uninvited at a Person's home. It is
the worst sort of intrusion and the ultimate in rudeness. Unless
there is a dire emergency which you KNOW to be the case, or unless
that Person has expressly stated that you are welcome to "drop
in" anytime without prior notice, DO NOT EVER.
DO
NOT EVER: Appoint yourself as a "matchmaker" between other
Persons. Do not contact one Person and without the prior knowledge
and permission of another Person, try to arrange a meeting, broker a
deal, offer your assistance, or otherwise meddle in the business of
other Persons. DO NOT EVER become an unwanted intermediary in the
business of others.
DO
NOT EVER: Give unsolicited advice. This applies across the board,
whether it is a friend, a family member or especially, a stranger. Do
not take it upon yourself to advise others, unless they have
specifically asked. If someone wants your advice, they will ask for
it. If they don't, it is not your place to foist it upon them.
DO
NOT EVER: Interrogate others about their personal habits, their
finances, their relationships or other private matters. Above all, do
not be a busybody who tells others how to live their lives; what they
"should" or "should not" be believing, doing,
spending, drinking, smoking, etc.
DO
NOT EVER: Think you have the right to "decide" for another
Person in situations where that person may have asked for your
assistance. If someone asks for your help, first find out HOW they
want and need to be helped, before you take any action. Respect the
wishes of those you are helping, rather than taking matters into your
own hands. If you are unable or unwilling to help them in the
specific ways they request, then say so, and leave them free to seek
help elsewhere.
DO
NOT EVER: Give a Person an animal for a "pet" without first
asking their permission. Many animals end up homeless or in shelters
because they were "dumped" on an unwitting recipient by a
do-gooder busybody who decided that they "needed" this
animal for a companion, or that the animal "needed" a good
home, when in fact it may not be a good match for either Person, the
animal or the human being.
DO
NOT EVER: Presume that you know what is "best" for another
Person. Only God knows what is best, and only the Person has the
right to decide that for himself. Whether he is "right" or
"wrong" is not your place to decide.
DO
NOT EVER: Buy a subscription to any publication in another Person's
name and have it sent to their mailing address/home address, without
first asking permission. Especially, if the Person is a Prisoner, you
may be compromising that Person's safety by doing so. Prisoners have
been punished (including being placed in solitary confinement) for
the indiscretions of do-gooder busybodies who have foolishly sent
"incendiary" material addressed to them.
DO
NOT EVER: Pay unwanted attention to any Person who has made it clear
(either directly or by their silence) that they do not want any
dealings or communication with you. DO NOT EVER harass another person
with unwanted e-mails. letters, telephone calls.
DO
NOT EVER engage in any form of stalking. If a Person has rejected
your advances (whether of friendship, "romance",
professional business or otherwise) leave that Person in peace!
DO
NOT EVER: Bear false witness against another Person, for any reason.
Period.
DO
NOT EVER: Threaten to, or engage in blackmail of another Person, for
any reason.
DO
NOT EVER: Use any form of coercion or extortion against another
Person.
DO
NOT EVER: Draw first blood.
DO
NOT EVER: Physically assault another person, except in self defense,
or in the defense of others.
DO
NOT EVER: Invade the private property, or the country of other
Persons.
DO
NOT EVER: Wage a war of aggression against other Persons.
DO
NOT EVER: Attribute all the evils of the world to any particular race
or ethnic origin of Persons, any particular religion of Persons, or
to the gender of Persons, making them into scapegoats.
DO
NOT EVER promote bigotry and hatred. DO NOT EVER attach blame
anywhere but with the specific INDIVIDUAL wrongdoers who perpetrated
the offenses or crimes, no matter how many, or how few.
Any
group that exists is made up of INDIVIDUALS. Each and every
Individual is given the same Free Will by Almighty God.
What
will you choose to do with yours?
RELATED
REPORTS
A
Nation of Snoops, Snitches & Busybodies: Tyrannical Government &
Monstrous Invasions of Privacy
http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2013/06/a-nation-of-snoops-snitches-busybodies.html
PRIVACY:
THE FINAL FRONTIER
http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2008/08/privacy-final-frontier.html
REAL
I.D.: The Death Knell of Personal Privacy
http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2010/06/real-id-death-knell-of-personal-privacy.html
Invasions
of Privacy & Meddling: Garden Variety Busybodies
http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2010/02/invasions-of-privacy-meddling-garden.html
Reflections
on Truth, Liberty and the Right to Privacy
http://barbarahartwellvscia.blogspot.com/2009/04/reflections-on-truth-liberty-and-right.html
Also see: THE RIGHT TO PRIVACY section on this website, where numerous violators of privacy are exposed by name.