January, 2003
For those reading this who don't know me or haven't read about my 'case' my name is Barbara Hartwell and I'm a survivor of CIA black ops and mind control programming under the infamous MK Ultra Project.
Code name: Black Angel.
There's quite a story behind that code name, one which I have not even begun to tell, perhaps which I will not live to tell. But I'll give you a hint: Some greedy TV executives stole my true story, souped it up, sensationalized it and made it into a series called "Dark Angel".
This was after I had refused the offer of a 'documentary film producer' (really a CIA asset) to make my true story into a movie (fictional, of course). You'd recognize the names of the Hollywood scavengers who wanted to get their hot little hands on my story.
I told the producer (who approached me after one of my lectures at a conference) that I was not interested in having everything I had been through and fought for trivialized, sanitized and sensationalized.
He wanted to fly me out to Hollywood to meet with the big-name producers. I was offered a lot of money.
But as God is my witness, if I ever DO get any money from CIA, it will not be for prostituting myself and selling out my country and fellow patriots.
No, if I ever do get the money I have earned through blood, sweat and tears, a fighting spirit and by the grace of God, it will be from damages awarded in a lawsuit against the bastards who used and abused me, stole my childhood and destroyed my life.
Fat chance!...no lawyer will touch my case with a ten foot pole.
I broke out of CIA's operations in 1994 after many years of battling with my handlers and decided to go public with my story in 1996.
Some people have asked me, Is there REALLY life after the CIA?
Something along the lines of asking if there's life after death, I suppose. The answer is a qualified and conditional 'yes'. That is, if you can consider relentless harassment; brutal persecution; isolation, alienation and deprivation; constant surveillance; crippling poverty and debilitating chronic illness to be a 'life'.
But from all indications, it looks as if this 'life' (such as it has been) is about to come to an end. The reason is not hard to fathom: I have been driven into a state of such extreme financial destitution and illness that it now appears there is little hope of recovery.
And there is no help in sight, at least not of the type that would make a real difference in saving my life. There is no cavalry riding up over the hills; no knight in shining armor; not even a lone commando to serve as backup in my hour of need.
My adversaries have done anything and everything they thought they could get away with to neutralize me and to stop me from speaking out about the tyranny and atrocities committed by the U.S. government in the name of 'National Security'.
We now have a band of ruthless, tyrannical warmongers in the White House.
For those who haven't yet woken up and smelled the coffee, we have a de facto dictatorship.
President G.W. Bush does not even RECOGNIZE the Constitution, much less has he kept his sacred oath to DEFEND it against all enemies foreign and domestic, so help him God.
And I seriously doubt that God will help him, since he and his cabal of cronies and minions are among the most spiritually and morally bankrupt people in the course of human history. Bush calls himself a "Christian". Say what?! A Christian???
What is only just now beginning to happen to the average citizen (and so far in a much milder form) since the 9-11 terrorist attacks and the advent of the USA Patriot Act and Homeland Security, had been happening to me and other survivors of government black operations for many years.
Airport searches and seizures. Electronic surveillance. Police check points. Bogus arrests simply for being in the 'wrong place at the wrong time'.
In the past, someone such as myself, deemed a high profile subversive; loose cannon; rogue operative; dissenter; enemy of the state; threat to National Security; or terrorist (and I have been called all of these things) at least had the dubious protection of knowing that the perpetrators would have to use 'plausible deniability' in their neutralization campaigns.
Now, they can harass, persecute and spy on American citizens with impunity. Defenders of the Constitution, or those courageous enough to claim their natural rights bestowed by God are actually deemed 'terrorists' by the powers-that-be.
And the tyrants are marching us all into the Twenty First Century New World Order Totalitarian Police State. Or at least they're doing their damnedest.
For those who survive it, simply because they choose to step into line and go along with the program; those who choose NOT to fight for their rights, I say, enjoy it, you'll get exactly what you deserve!
But they'll never march me into their Gulag Amerika. I've already been there, done that. Unless I can be free to live on my own terms, to preserve my dignity and human rights, they can best believe they'll never take me alive.
For years before I was finally able to break out, once and for all, of the enslavement of being 'utilized' by CIA under one of the most nefarious operations in the history of the United States, I ran for my life from place to place to place..... just trying to escape the ubiquitous government goons and spooks who surrounded me everywhere I went.
I endured two (2) years of 'house arrest' in motels from 1995-1997, after being driven out of one home after another in different states, by the machinations of the perpetrators.
Several attempts were made on my life through poisonings, arranged car 'accidents' and assaults with so-called 'non lethal' weapons. Needless to say, I survived them all, but there has never been a time when I could really say that my life was not at serious risk, particularly after I decided to go public with my case.
It took me six (6) years of hard work and numerous failed attempts to finally get my own website on the World Wide Web. Six years of computer sabotage; the destruction of five (5) computers along with all the files; theft of documents which served as evidence for my case; intimidation tactics against my webmasters (the first of whom had his apartment looted and trashed and his life threatened by goons); and heartbreaking betrayals by people I once considered friends and allies, some of whom are family members.
My articles [those connected to my case against CIA] were first published on the Internet in 1995, on a website called AlterNetReality, sponsored by some people from the Phoenix Project, one year after I had broken the mind control programming. That site didn't last long --sabotaged by gov't infiltrators.
I moved on a few years later to publish some of my story on Mind Control Forum in 1999.
[Note added December 2, 2006: MCF has since been taken over from the original owner, Ed Light. The current owner has disregarded my several directives to remove my reports from the site; reports which endorse ex-FBI agent Ted Gunderson, and which are outdated.
As a result, readers of that site are being presented with information which is not current; my situation is being misrepresented to the public; and I regularly have readers from the site attempting to contact me looking for professional assistance, when in fact I long ago made it a policy to have no contact with the general public. If the owner of MCF is reading this: Get my articles OFF your site, post haste!]
Since that time, through sheer persistence and grim determination, I have managed to get my work published with some regularity on several of the most prominent 'alternative media' websites. And I have never been paid one red cent, over the past eight (8) years by anyone who published my work.
Nor have I ever been paid one red cent for the cases I investigated; nor for the extensive research I have conducted.
Mostly, I have survived off the charity of friends and family or contributions from the public. Due to disability and chronic illness, a direct result of the abuses perpetrated on me in the black operations (and just try PROVING that !) I do not have the capability to be employed for wages or working regular hours.
I am not eligible for disability benefits or social security, since I have no "official" employment history. I have had no reliable source of income for many years. And now, I have no source of income at all.
Worse, I do not have even ONE person I can rely on for any kind of concrete support, financial or otherwise. 'Rely' being the operative word.
I am financially destitute, my health is deteriorating rapidly and I am completely alone against the escalating persecution. True, I have some people I consider to be close friends. But only a few, and none of them have the material resources to offer the assistance necessary to save the day, as far as my situation is concerned.
To date, I have done all that was in my power to do, and given all I have to give. I have shared what resources I had with others who needed help, even when it meant I could not pay my own bills.
I cannot continue doing my research and writing without being paid, without being able to earn a living and support myself and my cats. I cannot rely on contributions from supporters, they are just too few and far between.
Some so-called 'supporters' have made it clear that they have some agenda or other regarding me and that their 'help' will only be given if I cooperate. Strings attached......
Others have had a hidden agenda which they think I don't see. Anyway, no help is forthcoming from these folks once they see that I am not for sale, not my mind, not my body, not my loyalty. My loyalty is only to God and to doing the right thing, no matter the cost or the consequences to myself.
Today, my rent was due and I have no money to pay it. The phones will soon be shut off, along with the electric. I have no money to pay my car insurance. I'm living mostly off peanut butter sandwiches. I've been ill for over two months with the 'CIA flu'; can't afford vitamins and I'm almost out of allergy medication and painkillers. I can't sleep at night from the severe anxiety.
As I write this, my e-mail has been down since last night because of technical problems at my server. I have Internet access, but can't send or receive e-mail. I am neutralizing over 10 viruses a day and repelling many more hacking attempts.
I pray every day for a miracle, but my faith is wearing thin. Believe it or not, I haven't lost my sense of humor, since I don't have much else to lose. And no, this report is not satire; it's not hyperbole; it's the true state of affairs in my life.
If nothing else, it helps to know I must be doing something right.
I must be on the right track.
I know I'm telling and exposing the truth.
Otherwise, why would I be Wanted, Dead or Alive, the Black Angel: Enemy of the Police State.
Barbara Hartwell
January 7, 2003
Woodstock, New York
Addendum:
Six months after I wrote this report (June 2003) a "miracle" of sorts did occur. I unexpectedly inherited the house where I now live in Maine. God came through for me, after all; and in fact I had seen this in a vision, years before, after praying for God to allow me to live near the ocean, which has always been a source of peace and joy to me.
However, the general nature of my situation has not improved, as since relocating I have become more isolated than ever before, now living hundreds of miles away from my family members in New York.
As for the financial destitution, it's worse than ever, with no prospects in sight of any sort of reversal.
I still have no access to medical care and the only hope of a redress of grievances would be a lawsuit against the government --which I've been working on for many years and will continue to follow through on for as long as I live.
I've given up on the class actions which others (survivors/victims of government black ops and/or human rights abuses) have tried to recruit me into; most of those were revealed to be bogus, or worse, engineered by government operatives for the purpose of discrediting the testimony of whistleblowers and activists.
Just more containment operations to stop the truth from coming out; and to protect the vested interests of the powers-that-be.
The government is still persecuting me, though their methods have become (for the most part) less blatant, most likely as a result of my case being made so high profile over the years. Whatever they do to harass me, it is my policy to shout it from the rooftops! It doesn't reflect well on them.
And since I have never allowed myself to be intimidated by the goons, no matter what they did, I'm sure they realize that intimidation tactics are an exercise in futility, as least as far as I am concerned.
I have told these bastards, more than once: Anytime, anyplace, any weapon, or none at all.
None of the cowards have taken me up on the challenge. No, they would rather keep operating on plausible deniability --it's "safer" that way, at least for them.
The CIA asset mentioned in this report, the documentary filmmaker, is now deceased. My policy has usually been not to name such persons while they are alive, at least not in my public reports. But for those interested, his name was Boris Said.
I later learned of his involvement in various other projects and operations connected to CIA; though I knew him only briefly as a result of his approaching me regarding the "story of your life" movie offer.
I won't name the "Hollyowod scavengers" --not yet, anyway. Maybe sometime in future, if it serves a purpose.
Some of the operations I was involved in were truly bizarre. Though I was trained in psychological operations, there were many aspects of these ops which involved the paranormal; spiritual/psychic warfare; psychic "spying" (not Formal Remote Viewing --it went WAY beyond that!) --and even "time travel." Now, there's a loaded phrase...and that's all I'll say about it, at least right now.
For what may be obvious reasons, I have not focused on these "stranger-than-fiction" aspects of what I was involved in while being utilized by CIA. At least not much, and not often in my public writings. I have, however, discussed some of these issues and operations in my public lectures and on radio programs, over a period of years.
But it doesn't matter so much, at least to me, about publicizing the more bizarre aspects of my training or the government projects involving the metaphysical. These things are nearly impossible to establish "proof" for; and for this reason, don't enhance the credibility of the expositor.
My main concern is, and always has been, human rights; and the massive violations of those rights being systematically perpetrated by the U.S. Government. Fascist tyranny, that is what is most important to expose.
And so, the purpose of my reports is for the most part educational: That is, to provide information to the public so that they might make informed choices in defending their human/Constitutional rights. Rights bestowed by God and protected and guaranteed under the U.S. Constitution.
As always, I advise the readers to "make of the reports what they will".
Most importantly, to do their own research if they wish to establish the truth, in my reports or any others.
I trust that God will do the rest, at least where sincere seekers of the truth are concerned.
BH
Ocean Park, Maine
December 2, 2006